“This is only the fourth day of school,” said the Badger Bus Dispatcher when I called I this morning long after Julia was supposed to be picked up for school. Bob, the Dispatcher, who seems like a nice enough guy, called the driver who told Bob that he had been outside our house and waited for minutes before taking off at 7:51; however, we were outside sitting on our steps at 7:48 and no one stopped from the time until just after 8:00. Give or take a few minutes and the possibility that clocks differ, the upshot was that I drove Julia to school and she got there at 8:20. First period begin at 8:10. Continue reading
Category: Growing a Daughter
Updates and stories about my daughter from China who came home with challenges described in letters—PDD-NOS (on the autism spectrum), ADHD and RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder). Her learning curve has been steep and therapy is a way of life. School and social interactions are a challenge. Making art is a way of life. So is a vivid imagination.
1st day 10th grade
Every year, on Julia’s first day of school, I have one glorious, luxurious fantasy. I take a long hot, deep bubble and salts bath with a glass of prosecco and a few choice pieces of very dark chocolate waiting for me. Afterwards, I indulge in a massage and facial. I expect nothing more of myself that day other than to enjoy and revel in the indulgence. (FYI: I never indulged in such fantasy raising a typical child and working full time. I usually regretted homework free time together, but that was the extend of first day of school musings.) In reality, I am prone to waste the day, dithering in the house, hanging out much too long on the internet, trying to find reasons not to get off the couch and at the same time, pushing myself to mop up after the summer, take care of money matters, correspondence and everything I’ve put aside in favor of whatever was happening with Julia. That is much closer to what I am doing today. Continue reading
game night
Last weekend of the summer. School begins Wednesday morning. Julia’s schedule appears to be set—the elusive second art class has been added and it is ceramics. She will have ceramics in the morning and her last class of the day will be computer illustration. In between, she will have Earth Science, English, Choir, pre-Algebra and a guided study hall.
This getting of classes was an abbreviated battle this year and my advocacy pattern was pretty transparent. I send very polite and patient emails. A healthy understanding of budgets and shortfalls. I am answered with a ‘no.’ I pose an alternative with the same response. No, she was closed out of that class, no, meetings are too hard to schedule before school opens, no, change is not possible. I snap . . . ok, I don’t snap; I step back. I consult with my cabal of special ed moms. Wait a few days. And write another email. “Julia needs a second art class. How do we get it?” I don’t quite see the change in tone but the response comes quickly. Classes are moved around a bit. Her Earth Science section is changed (there is no special ed resource person is either section) and she is placed in the ceramics class. Why that wasn’t offered when I first asked, I do not ask. I take a deep, cleansing breath and send a thank you note. Continue reading
pointing towards a new season
It has taken the entire summer to get Julia journaling on paper. Previously and for a number of years, she journaled during the school year on her iPad. My aim for this summer was to get her to write and draw on a page and although there was a lot to write about and draw during our Australian travels, she was not always very happy about doing any of it. Finally, finally, finally, this week writing and drawing have been done with minimal reminders. Sometimes it is even choice work. Continue reading
anxiety
Julia survived cheer camp. So did I.
From what I heard from the coach and what I gathered from Julia, she did not participate much on Saturday. She was content to sit on the side and watch. I have seen her do that before and if such behavior helps her integrate into a new situation, it is a good way to find herself. It must have been pretty overwhelming with cheer teams from all over doing all those cheery-type things very loudly. An unfortunate side note, Julia had her phone with her and she spent a lot of the day texting with girls back in Madison. On one hand, it was good practice, but on the other, I’ve seen this behavior consume all her attention and make her unavailable to do much else. The next day, Sunday, Julia did participate and she said she had a good time. I don’t think she performed with her team at the end of the camp but she enjoyed what she did. Continue reading
weekend cheer camp
This morning, 6 a.m., I dropped her off at school and she climbed onto a yellow bus filled with enthusiastic, yet somewhat drowsy cheerleaders each with identical shorts and tee shirts. Cheer camp weekend! The team will arrive at a high school a few towns over before 8, register and begin their very scheduled day at 9. Warm ups, chant class, dance class, stunt class, jump class, private coaching, cheer class and evaluation until 9:30 p.m., to be repeated tomorrow until they board the bus again at 9:00 p.m. In between, they will sleep on the gym floor.
Probably while she was still on the bus, Julia texted me to say “hi” and after I responded and said, “love you,” she wrote “love you too mom.”
But that was hours ago . . . . Continue reading
homecoming
Home three days and although I repeat that I am emerging from the fog, I underestimate the strength of the body to hold on to the time zone it woke up in. Our sleep is topsy turvy and I am knackered (British for exhausted with an onomatopoeic flare describing me rather perfectly right now.).
The practice must be patience.
Wednesday, our travel day, was smooth but when I first woke up on Thursday, I could not make sense of the entirety of what was Wednesday. Indeed, we boarded a plane at noon in Sydney, flew for 18 hours to arrive in Madison at 5 in the afternoon. We slept some, watched too many movies and ate too often. About six hours before we were to land, we were served a major “snack.” I thought it was breakfast when the crew member woke me up. I woke Julia up and then realized our remaining time. Had I some presence of mind I would have refused the snack and slept. Continue reading
snorkeling
Best magical vacation day! Maybe ever! One of those experiences where pictures are not easily taken. I would have sprung for an underwater camera if I had known the day and had I known where to get one.
Julia and I went snorkeling. Continue reading
port douglas 2
22 July 2018. Sunday
“Wherever you go, there you are.” ~Jon Kabasa-Zinn
And so are the mosquitoes. ~Me
I’ve carried the bug spray and Sarna on trips where we never took them out of the bag. In Sydney and Uluru, I thought it would be the same this time. In the tropical north of Australia, we are thankful to have carried both. I swear if there is one mosquito on a continent, it finds us. We have been found by more than one. Continue reading
week in a million pictures
The week has completely run away from me and now we are traveling in three ( yes, 3! Eek!) days. So, before traveling I am posting pictures from our NYC visit and from the Penguin Project production. And then I’ll get back to travel prep.
Favs from MOMA:
Chasing Joy 