A short note on grief: To anyone who has silently complained about a friend grieving too long, or who has wondered WHEN their own grieving would cease and themselves back to their old self, I have learned that grieving is a process without end. You grow the rest of your life around it, it doesn’t disappear. At some time, you will or you might do everything you would have done before losing your beloved. You might do more than your pre-grieving life could have imagined but at any moment, the everyday round can side swipe you.
Today, a Mary Oliver poem popped in my inbox and I read:
your life, which is so close
to my own that I would not know
where to drop the knife of
separation. And what does this have to do
with love, except
Nine years disappeared and I was right there wondering about the me who considered myself so independent through out all of my marriage and who found breathing almost impossible after David stopped breathing.
And it is with so many feelings, including gratitude, that I find myself back there. Or rather, right here.