the best laid schemes . . .

I had plans today.  And we all know what happens to plans.  And sometimes it is more than hard to figure out just which clause of the Serenity Prayer should be in play right now. Or as Cheshire says, “2020 laughs at your plans.”

I predicted that we would not get to an outcome for the presidential election last night or this morning; however, I find that a definitive landslide for the Democrats was a wish lodged deep in my heart.  

I fell asleep listening to election returns in bed on my laptop just before midnight and woke up a few hours later in time to hear the NPR host talking about trump’s victory speech.  I groaned, closed the laptop, turned over and went back to sleep.  I had at least two unnerving dreams during which friends who I haven’t seen in a very long time appeared.  I hugged them hard.

Gosh, I needed that.

And then in the morning I woke up ready to write this post and dig into the creative work of the day right after I got Julia to school.

Julia had an easy morning at home today.  We had an extra long time to meditate and she did all of her own packing up.  She had a fine ride to school, but as she was getting out of the car at school, she began to ramp up.  She was angry.  She started talking about her iPad and how she had to buy apps.  She stood at the car door and was unwilling to say good-bye to me until I said she could have the apps and the iPad. I cannot say ‘yes’ to these demands. This not so subtle form of blackmail is something that she did for much of last year. When it happened in the past she usually has a day of cursing and talking about killing herself at school.  The two of us have talked about this circumstance a lot. I have told her that I do not believe that it is fair to release her ramped up mood and the resulting behavior to the school house door. In our talks, she agreed that when she was so angry before going into school, that I would bring her home for a part or all of the day.

I pulled my car over to the side of the circle drive at school—I was blocking a school van that wanted to get out—and two of her teachers came out to talk to her. Julia continued to ramp up. She could not even hear her teachers. 

So, she is home.  Yelling and cursing at the moment.  I’ve asked her to fold some clothes and to empty the dishwasher.  Other than those directions, I am going to try not to engage. Julia has zoom classes today that she could zoom into from home, but it doesn’t seem likely that she will get out her chrome book. It is hard for me to allow a school day to go by without doing some school work, but I am trying my best to hold to my resolve of non-engagement.

I could, however, email her therapists and school counselor.  One of her therapists is coming over after lunch to talk to her and take a walk.  

The fire of the early morning election musing is out. Julia takes way too much energy to meaningfully expound on votes and the electoral college.  Only one thought remains: From what I’ve heard on the news, trump has or will soon file challenge(s) regarding continuing to count votes after midnight last night in accordance with various state laws.  He hopes to get his challenges heard before the Supreme Court and without a doubt, expects his packed Court to deliver the election to him. If the Court does as he wishes, a great disservice will be done to our judiciary and our Constitution.  In finding Constitutional and legal reasons to allow a sitting president to stop the counting of votes before every vote in counted, this Court will be walking in the foot steps of the same court that delivered the opinions in Korematsu v. United States, 323 U.S. 214 (1944) (held that the exclusion of Japanese Americans from the West Coast Military Area during World War II was constitutional), and Dred Scott v. Sandford, 60 U.S. 393 (1857) (held that the Constitution was not meant to include American citizenship for black people, regardless of whether they were enslaved or free, and so the rights and privileges that the Constitution confers upon American citizens could not apply to them). There is very little of our precious democracy that this awful man-child has left unscathed. I fear the world will not easily forgive us for putting this fascist in power for another term.  And I don’t blame them.

3 thoughts on “the best laid schemes . . .

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